Where has the time gone?

Where has the time gone?

I’ve asked myself that question too many times this week

·      during my daughter’s last Mother’s Day Program at school

·      while snapping photos of my son & daughter in their “dressy” clothes both ready for a date night with me & my husband

·      while making my daughter’s lunch for her class picnic

·      while helping my son carry in his class project he & his daddy worked on

·      when I woke up this morning & realized my baby is graduating from Kindergarten tonight.

My mind replays so many moments of their young lives from birth to their first steps, their first days in preschool to ballgames, spontaneous hugs & kisses to cuddling in bed for movie night.

But in all of the replays I find myself beating myself up for the brush-offs when I’ve been “busy” and pushed aside a child who wants attention. I feel guilty for not being patient enough to answer a curious question. And I regret losing my temper when a deep breath and calming hug would have been the best response.

That’s when I’m reminded to Refocus. Refocus my mind & heart on God and let Him lead my responses and my actions. And I need to remember to give myself grace because there may be days when I don’t get it all right.

I will make mistakes and become distracted. I will become impatient and react the wrong way. But, as long as I stay focused on the plans God has for me each day He will direct my actions & my thoughts.

When I begin to beat myself up I need to remind myself that there will be days when I have things that must get done & it’s ok for the kids to entertain themselves.

When I feel guilty for losing my patience I need to tell myself next time I will thank God that my son is so curious and help him learn by answering his question.

When I start to lose my temper I will remember Psalm 19:14

“May the words of my

mouth and the meditation

of my heart be pleasing in

your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.”

So, tonight as I cry through my daughter’s Kindergarten Graduation I will take in each and every moment of this gift from God. I will live for the moment and thank God for the honor of raising my precious children.

In His Calm,

Mary

Loving those who hurt us

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Have you been hurt by someone close to you? Have you felt the sting of betrayal from a close friend? Have you heard the lies whispered behind your back or felt the blows of venom & hate as you were attacked by those who only thought they knew the whole story?

I dare say there isn’t a person who hasn’t at some point & time experienced pain from betrayal, gossip, & lies. In the midst of that pain it is natural to want to lash out & retaliate for the wounds that have been made.

Normal human self-preservation drives us to want to hurt those who hurt us or speak up to defend ourselves when doing so would hurt others.

But Jesus in His Amazing Grace & Love gave us an example of how we are to treat those who hurl accusations, betray, mock, slander & hurt us.

“Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” Luke 23:34

I imagine Jesus up on the cross as

·      soldiers laughed & mocked him & fought over His clothes

·      the criminal who hung next to Him insulted Him

·      the crowd stood by watching & not doing anything to help

and then instead of becoming angry & yelling back at them or wanting to hurt them, He cried out begging God to forgive them. He loved His Father so much that He chose to do God’s Will over His own comfort.

Could you do that? Could I do that?

When those around you hurt you, do you pray for them instead of returning the anger with more anger?

In Matthew 4:43-48 Jesus tells us we are to love our enemies.

“But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven.” Matthew 5:44,45a

Jesus tells us we are to love and pray for those who hurt us.

You may be thinking, “but you have no idea how much I have been hurt, there is no way I could pray for the person who has hurt me.”

Believe me, I know it’s hard; I’ve been there. And when I’ve been there this is what I’ve done:

·      I’ve asked God to soften my heart for them. I’ve asked Him to reveal one way I can pray for them.

·      I’ve prayed Psalm 19:14 “May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.”

·      I’ve stayed focused on Christ and His Love for me on the cross.

When I’ve kept my eyes & heart focused on the Cross, my heart & my mouth have stayed in line with God’s Will.

My prayer is that you too will stay focused on the Cross & Jesus’ example of how to love those who hurt you.

Continuing the Joy Dare #1120 - #1132:

• beautiful day at the zoo
• overcoming my fear of heights with my daughter
• hike in the woods with friends
• popcorn, icees & cotton candy
• oreos on the way home from the zoo = happy kids
• Life is Good! God is Good!
• working in the yard as a family
• kids playing in the sprinkler
• playing baseball as a family
• frozen yogurt to cool off on a warm afternoon
• grilled bratwurst after baseball practice
• all 4 of us snuggled up in bed watching The Lion King
• sleeping in

In His Calm,
Mary

Refocus ~ Sanctuary

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“Lord, prepare me to be a Sanctuary, Pure & Holy, Tried & True. And with Thanksgiving, I’ll be a living Sanctuary for you.”

Over the years the name for the place of worship in a Church has changed from Sanctuary to Worship Center. I haven’t embraced that change easily. In my mind a Sanctuary is a place of reverence & honor. When we worship God we show Him reverence & honor. For me a Worship Center seemed less formal & more relaxed…in a way less honoring.

As my personal walk with Christ grew I realized it’s not about the name of where I worship or the style of my worship, it’s about the attitude of my heart.

·      My heart must kneel before God in Honor & Reverence.

·      My heart must be willing to bow before Him humbly laying before Him my sin, my pain & my fear.

·      My heart must be willing to hear what He has to say.

There are days when my heart is not the sanctuary it should be. This morning was one of those days. I was frustrated, impatient & unhappy.

After walking a bit too loud & closing doors a bit too hard I sat in my car & took a deep breath. Ugh!

I began praying Psalm 19:14

Lord, “May the words of my mouth (and my actions) and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my rock & my redeemer”.

As I prayed, the lyrics to the song Sanctuary came to my mind. As I sang the song I felt my tension ease & my mind settle as I began to Refocus my heart & mind on Christ.

My heart, mind & body are a Sanctuary to God. When I am frustrated & unhappy I am not pleasing Him by acting & saying things that don’t honor him.

Some days I must, minute by minute Refocus my heart & mind on Him, other days it is much easier.

When my attitude & heart are focused on worshipping God my body becomes His Sanctuary, “pure & holy, tried & true”.

These days whether the place I worship is called a Sanctuary or Worship Center no longer takes center stage. What I am focused on is an attitude of praise, thanksgiving & worship.

What is the attitude of your heart, mind & body?

Do your actions & words please & honor God?

I am linked today with Melanie at Only a Breath for her One Word Linkup party.

In His Calm,

Mary

Refocus ~ Focusing on The Cross

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."

Hebrews 12:1-2

Where is your focus? Upon what are your eyes fixed?

Do you see the dream God has given you clearly before you or do you see a blurry figment of your dream?

Oh so easily we become distracted by the things around us. We take our eyes off God, instead looking to people around us for the answers and direction we seek. We loose sight of the dream God placed in our hearts. The busyness & needs of those around us distract our mind & thoughts. Flashy lifestyles & desire for power lure us from the true focus of God's plan & call for our lives.

Hebrews 12:1 tells us to "throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles".

What or who hinders you from pursuing the dream and call God placed on your life? What sin has entangled you, blurring the vision of the dream God placed in your life? What do you need to "throw off" that is keeping you from finishing the race God has called you to?

"...let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith..."

The dream God gives us may not be reached with a fast sprint. It may be a marathon in which we must persevere and pace ourselves. There may be times when we become tired, lose our focus & stray off the path. But God has surrounded us with a "great cloud of witnesses" who will be there to encourage & strengthen us and point us back to the path that God has placed before us. Do you have someone-mentor who will come along side you and help point you back to the dream God placed in your heart?

Jesus is the author and perfecter of our faith. He endured the shame, discouragement, pain & heartbreak of the Cross for us and NEVER lost sight of the plan God had for His Life!

When we keep our eyes focused on Him & The Cross we will not lose sight of the dream God placed on our lives.

Have you lost focus on the dream God placed in your life? What do you need to do in order to refocus on The Cross & the dream?

In His Calm,


Mary

Refocus ~ The words I speak to my husband...

Do I speak words to my husband that show my love for him?

Do I speak words to my husband that encourage & life him up?

Do I pray for my husband?

In April Jeff & I will be married for 15 years & together for 19 years. When we first met & dated we were together as much as possible & talked on the phone for hours.

Nineteen years later life has changed a lot. We are not the carefree college kids we once were. We have responsibilities at work, home & church. We have 2 kids & family responsibilities. Many times at the end of the day we fall into bed exhausted without having a chance to really talk.

Do you find yourself in a similar situation? Do you & your husband take time to know what is going on with each other? Do you make it a point to show him your love?

"Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one anther..." Hebrews 10:25

When we as a husband and wife Refocus on each other & make a point to sit and talk we gain in many areas.

• We learn ways we can encourage each other.
• We have an opportunity to discuss small issues before they have a chance to mushroom into bigger problems.
• We find out ways we can pray for each other
• Taking time to sit and listen to Jeff shows I am interested in him and is an expression of my love for him.

It is also a time to protect my marriage from

• miscommunication
• hurt feelings
• drifting apart.

It pleases God to see a strong marriage where the husband & wife communicate, encourage each other & support each other.

What specifically can you do this week to Refocus your time & attention on your husband?

Dear Lord, I thank you for my husband. Thank you that you desire for my marriage to be one filled with encouragement and love. Lord I pray that you will help me to slow down and refocus my attention on my husband. Show me specifically what I can do this week to encourage and pray for my husband. In Your Name I Pray.

I am linked today with Melanie at Only A Breath. Visit her blog to see all the wonderful One Word posts.


In His Calm,

Mary

The "perfect" mom & wife

Did you see her? I’m sure you did. I know my sister & I did.

She was the one popping up on facebook, pinterest, instagram, & twitter sharing the perfect crafts & goodies she made with her kids over the holidays. She’s the one who had the beautiful Christmas cards out the day after Thanksgiving. And she’s the one who calmly welcomed dozens of people into her perfectly decorated home to celebrate Christmas with made from scratch goodies.

Yep, she’s Super Mom! The wife, mother, sister & friend who manages to have it all together while I’m the one struggling to remember what day it is.

I’m the one who ran out of the house like a crazy woman trying to get to my son’s class Christmas party on time and the one who forgot to send the books with my daughter for her gift exchange at school. I’m the one who made a vow I would have my Christmas cards out just after Thanksgiving this year instead of the end of January like last year. But to no avail…I was still scrambling to get them in the mail before Christmas Eve. And I’m the one who had the mismatched serving pieces and platters from the grocery store mixed with some homemade goodies franticly scurrying around to make sure everything was perfect.

In today’s world of social media it’s easy to compare ourselves to other Moms. We see another woman and think, “Look at her, she has it all together. Her children are dressed beautifully. Her husband comes home to a hot cooked meal on the table every night. She works fulltime and keeps a spotless house. But I can’t manage to get myself showered in the morning.”

On Christmas eve while I was sitting in the middle of my floor at 2:30 in the morning wrapping Christmas gifts – yes I really was wrapping gifts just hours before they were opened – I realized it’s not about being the “perfect” mom I think I am suppose to be.

It’s about being the mom & wife God wants me to be. God knew what He was doing when He placed my husband & me together. He knew what He was doing when He gave me my children.

He knew exactly what my husband needed in a wife and He knew exactly what my children needed in a mom.

I’m not called to be the “perfect” mom & wife shown on facebook, pinterest, instagram & twitter.

I’m called to be the PERFECT mom GOD called me to be!

But what does that mom look like? How do I know who that perfect mom in God’s eye is? When I spend time in God’s word - meditating, studying & praying - I learn how to be the mom & wife God has called me to be.

He shows me what is important for my family. And He shows me what sacrifices need to be made in order for my family to thrive. After all, whether we want to admit it or not, the “perfect” mom we see in social media has to make sacrifices too. We just don’t see those sacrifices.

This year as I “Refocus” on the mom & wife God has called me to be I will set my sights on pleasing God and being the “perfect” mom & wife in His eyes.

Do you struggle with living up to the standards of the “perfect” mom & wife you see in social media, I would love for you join me this year on The Calm of His Presence as we Refocus our hearts towards God.

Dear Lord, Thank you for the gift of a loving husband and children. Thank you that you trust me to love them and minister to them. Help me to stay focused on your call for me in our family. Help me to be the “perfect” wife & mom you have called me to be. In Your Name I Pray, Amen.

In His Calm,

Mary

Refocus - One Word 2013

During 2012 my One Word was Intentional. I knew it was going to be a very busy & exciting year and because of that I also knew I was going to have to be Intentional in staying in God's Word and spending time with my family. If I wasn't intentional with those things it would be very easy for me to put them on the back burner.

2012 was one of the most incredible years I have ever had but, it was also one of the most difficult years I have ever had. I experienced tremendous growth & exhilarating moments along with agony & despair all through following God.

I have a mentor who frequently says that "following God is never boring" and 2012 is a prime example of that, 2012 was filled with blessings from the good, the bad & the in between.

As 2012 came to a close God laid on my heart Psalm 19:14. I quickly new this would be my focus verse for 2013.

There is so much God has already begun to teach me through this verse. Multiple times each day I stop, take a deep breath and pray this verse. My deepest desire is that the words of my mouth & the meditation of my heart be pleasing to God.

I would love for you to join me in 2013 as I delve into how God is going to use Psalm 19:14 to Refocus my mouth & my heart on God.

Has God led you to a verse or "One Word" for 2013? Please share it with us in the comment section so that we can all see what God is going to do for you in 2013.

Thank you so much to Melanie at Only a Breath who so graciously made the One Word button for me. I am linked today with Melanie as she brings together others who are focusing on "One Word" for 2013.

In His Calm,

Mary