God's plans

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,

neither are your ways my ways,”

declares the Lord,

“As the heavens are higher than the earth.

So are my ways higher than your ways

and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

Isaiah 55:8,9

I know I’ve been a bit sporadic in my blogging lately.

Going into the summer I had grand plans of writing every morning here on the blog, fun activities for the kids, lots of reading, lots of cooking & lots of resting. I had goals personally & with my ministry. As much as I wanted to be successful with my goals my prayer was that my life this summer would line up with God’s plans.

As I’ve spent time in His Word each morning I’ve found His plans for my time were not always what I envisioned.

One thing I have found consistent is spending time with my kids & husband. Where I thought I needed to spend time focused on my blog, God said your ministry this summer is with your family.

And boy has that ministry been fun – days spent by the pool, running around on the beach, snuggled on the couch reading with my daughter, throwing the baseball with my son, planning & praying over a new ministry opportunity with my husband. This summer my family & I have built memories & bonds that were built & planned by God.

Memories and bonds built and planned by God exceed our human expectations.

This coming school year will look totally different for my family as we change schools. And while the changes are exciting they hold a bit of nervousness & anxiety. My prayer is that this summer of family time will prepare us for the changes that are to come.

So if I continue to be a bit sporadic with my postings please bear with me. I promise once school starts up I will be here more often.

Please know that although I may not be posting as often, there is still a lot going on behind the scenes of The Calm of His Presence. God is leading me in some wonderful new directions. I can’t wait to tell you more about it in the coming months.

So my sweet bloggy friends, I pray that God is building memories & bonds for you and your family that exceed your expectations.

In His Calm,

Mary

Five Minute Friday ~ Present

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Its another week of Five Minute Friday. Today's prompt is Present. Take some time to visit the other wonderful writers at Five Minute Friday.

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Birthday Presents

Mother’s Day Presents

Anniversary Presents

There are so many days each year when I receive presents but today I received the best present.

It wasn’t wrapped in pretty paper with a bow on top. It wasn’t wrapped in a designer bag with bright colored tissue paper coming out of the top. It wasn’t a card with money enclosed.

It was wrapped in a warm blanket given to me on a regular day with clothes piled high, dishes in the sink, toys covering the floor & dust on the dresser.

This present… was the gift of living in the moment with my son & daughter snuggled under a warm blanket in the middle of the afternoon, reading out loud - moments we don’t often receive but a precious gift of time to bond & and a moment when my to do list was nowhere on my mind.

STOP

Dear Weary Mom~tired & short tempered

Dear Weary Mom,

I know you are looking to me for help but can I confess something to you?

I blew it yesterday. I lost my temper & my coping skills. I was short fused & unwilling to take a deep breath, instead of going into a heated situation calmly I ended up making it worse.

I behaved just as bad as my 6 year old. She didn’t like my answer to a question so she screamed, moaned & groaned, stomped around & slammed doors.

My response? I yelled & fussed & stomped around & made ultimatums. Yep, I was the one in my late 30s acting like a 6-year-old little girl.

Enter in the point when I start beating myself up for being a horrible mom… I felt awful.

I questioned how in the world I was going to break the cycle of yelling & screaming I grew up with if I behaved that way to my daughter.

I beat myself up for being so kind & loving with the 100+ preschoolers in VBS this week, only to come home & lose my patience with my daughter.

It was then that I realized just like my daughter needed a nap I too, was totally exhausted & needed some time to myself.

I took a deep breath & asked God to help me make it through the rest of my day showing her love & grace. I knew I needed Him to help me use the coping skills I have in order to teach her how best to handle a situation.

And then my husband walked in the door and diffused her mood completely.

I took some time to myself & refocused on showing her love & grace.

And now, the morning after a good nights rest I am ready to start the day fresh by apologizing for my behavior & extending grace & love to her as needed.

So, my weary friend, please know there will be days when you both are tired & short tempered. In those days remember to take a deep breath, ask God for help in extending grace. Allow your husband the opportunity to come in & “save the day”. And be willing to “suck it up” and say you’re sorry to your little girl.

I am linked today with the ladies at Hope for the Weary Mom.

In His Calm,

Mary

When a daughter's words cut the heart...

“I am leaving my house and will continue my life as an orphan”, -words written by my 6 year old daughter.

As I tried to make sense of the words written in red ink by a little girl who is just learning to read & write she angrily decoded the words on the page.

I sat stunned by the pain my little girl had just caused. Did I really just hear those words? Did my sweet, loving, kind-hearted baby girl just cut my heart with a knife by her words?

My son stood over my shoulder shocked too, waiting for my response.

But how do I respond? Do I express how much she just hurt me or do I remind myself of the truth that she is just a 6-year-old little girl who doesn’t completely understand the full effect of her words?

She was mad. I get that. But I can’t respond the same way she responded by using hurtful words & letting my emotions get the best of me.

So, I calmly told both kids to get their pajamas on & get in bed.

I couldn’t believe our first official day of summer (filled with swimming, laughter & working together) was going to end like this- all because my daughter was mad because she didn’t get a popsicle when she refused to eat her dinner.

By the time I tucked her into bed my daughter had begun to understand the full effects of her words. I hadn’t said a word, I wasn’t stomping around, I was just quiet – my heart was aching & I was weary. I just needed some time to nurse my broken spirit.

During bedtime prayers she cried & told me how sorry she was, and as she cried I comforted her. Because that’s what mommas do, we comfort our kids & tell them we love them even when they say hurtful things to us. Because we know they are just little beings that we are charged with raising.

It is our responsibility to teach them between right & wrong.

It is our responsibility to teach them the right way to respond when they are hurt.

It is our responsibility to teach them that when they make a mistake they can ask for forgiveness & through our forgiveness of them they may catch a glimpse of God’s forgiveness.

My husband came home just after the kids went to bed and as he kissed them goodnight my daughter shared everything with her daddy. I sat quietly in the den nursing my weary soul, trying to speak words of God’s truth to my heart. Trying desperately to push the words of question & frustration out of my head…

·      What’s the point in trying hard to plan a fun, exciting summer for the kids?

·      Does anybody know or really care what I do around here?

·      Why did I give up my career in nursing to stay home & take care of the kids?

words I know that are not true but words I still struggled with.

And then I overheard my husband talking with my children. He answered each of those questions as he talked with our kids. Did he have a direct line to my thoughts?

With each answer to those questions God used Jeff’s words to speak to my weary heart. God reminded me why I stay home to care for the kids. He reminded me why I clean crumbs off the floor again, pick up a toy I’ve stepped on with my bare feet again, wash & fold the 10^th load of laundry for the day, & move over at 3:00 in the morning when my daughter has a bad dream.

I do all these things because that is what God has called me to do.

·      He has called me to love my children.

·      He has called me to raise them in His Truths.

·      He has called me to stay at home & take care of things while my husband is at work.

God has called me to a task that will take years to see the full effects of my work. There will be days of joy & laughter and there will be days of heartbreak & weariness. But, in all the days I will cling to God and give my actions & my words to Him & trust Him to help me raise them in His Ways.

“Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and He will establish your plans.” Proverbs 16:3

So, are you a weary Mom like me? Today I'm linked with other Moms who are traveling the journey of motherhood. I would love for you to visit Hope for the Weary Mom.

Five Minute Friday - View

This morning I'm trying something new :-). 

I have been watching from the sidelines for a little while this thing called Five Minute Fridays on Lisa-Jo Baker's website. Its a time when writers set their timers for 5 minutes and write freely on a topic chosen by Lisa-Jo. Today the topic is VIEW so here goes nothing...

GO

I sat in my blue camp chair again last night. I was up on a hill overlooking a baseball field, a playground, bleachers & kids running back & forth.

I watched with dread, nerves, excitement & pride as my son came up to bat. “Oh Lord”, I prayed, “please let him hit the ball”!

CRACK!!! And away went the ball, sailing straight for centerfield.

And off went my son running to 1^st base as I stood and cheered & yelled & clapped.

As my son settled down on 1^st base & pride filled my heart I turned to eye my daughter on the playground.

And nothing… I couldn’t see her anywhere. My heart skipped a beat as I walked around trying to get a different view so I could somehow see her.

I searched the bathroom & asked friends if they had seen her. Nothing. No one had seen her.

Just as panic was setting in I took a deep breath & prayed “Lord, please help me find her, I know she’s here. Let me see her.”

As I turned around to get another view I saw her playing with an older friend just on the other side of the hill.

She had no idea I was nervously searching for her. After giving her a big hug and reminding her she must let me know if she is moving to a different spot to play, I walked back to my view on the hill overlooking the baseball field & playground.

This morning as I look back on my view of last night I wonder,

Is this like God’s view?

Does He watch with pride as one of His children emerges from a “slump” only to turn around and find another child has wondered off?

STOP

Now that was fun & freeing! Why don't you take some time today and read what others had to say on "VIEW". 

 

In His Calm,

Mary

Cries from a Mom

It’s a gray, foggy, overcast morning as I sit in tears reading news accounts of Monday’s devastating tornado that hit Oklahoma.

My children are still comfortably asleep while there is a mom who will never wake her children again on a foggy, overcast morning.

On Monday night I sat at the baseball field with tears in my eyes as I watched my son, who has worked so hard to overcome a batting slump, strike out yet again. My eyes filled with tears as I watched him slowly, with shoulders slumped over & head hung low, drag the bat behind him towards the dugout. I begged God to help him hit the ball, to give him the encouragement he needed, and then when he didn’t hit the ball… I admit, with shame, I was frustrated at God for not answering my prayer.

Oh how bad I feel for being so frustrated! As I sat in my blue camp chair upset because my third grade son was sad because he had struck out again, there was a mom of a third grade boy who was walking around in the rubble of an elementary school crying out to God to save her boy.

A mom who cried out in desperation longing to hear and see her child once again…

A mom who thought when she dropped her son off at school in the morning she would see him again that afternoon…

A mom who desperately wants the opportunity to sit in a blue camp chair beside a baseball field hoping her son will break his batting slump…

As a mom there will be many times I will cry tears of joy and tears of sadness for my son.

But, today, as a mom I cry tears of grief & sorrow for the mom who won’t have the opportunity to wake her son from a night of sleep, or pick her son up from school, or sit in a blue camp chair and watch her son play baseball.

I don’t know why and I struggle to understand why tragedy like this happen. But today I cry and pray, that somewhere in the unbearable pain this mom is feeling, that she will feel God’s strong, loving, caring arms wrap tight around her. I pray that she will know Psalm 46:10 “Be still, and Know that I am God” and in the midst of the questions & whys that “the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard (her) heart and mind in Christ Jesus” Philippians 4:7.

Where has the time gone?

Where has the time gone?

I’ve asked myself that question too many times this week

·      during my daughter’s last Mother’s Day Program at school

·      while snapping photos of my son & daughter in their “dressy” clothes both ready for a date night with me & my husband

·      while making my daughter’s lunch for her class picnic

·      while helping my son carry in his class project he & his daddy worked on

·      when I woke up this morning & realized my baby is graduating from Kindergarten tonight.

My mind replays so many moments of their young lives from birth to their first steps, their first days in preschool to ballgames, spontaneous hugs & kisses to cuddling in bed for movie night.

But in all of the replays I find myself beating myself up for the brush-offs when I’ve been “busy” and pushed aside a child who wants attention. I feel guilty for not being patient enough to answer a curious question. And I regret losing my temper when a deep breath and calming hug would have been the best response.

That’s when I’m reminded to Refocus. Refocus my mind & heart on God and let Him lead my responses and my actions. And I need to remember to give myself grace because there may be days when I don’t get it all right.

I will make mistakes and become distracted. I will become impatient and react the wrong way. But, as long as I stay focused on the plans God has for me each day He will direct my actions & my thoughts.

When I begin to beat myself up I need to remind myself that there will be days when I have things that must get done & it’s ok for the kids to entertain themselves.

When I feel guilty for losing my patience I need to tell myself next time I will thank God that my son is so curious and help him learn by answering his question.

When I start to lose my temper I will remember Psalm 19:14

“May the words of my

mouth and the meditation

of my heart be pleasing in

your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.”

So, tonight as I cry through my daughter’s Kindergarten Graduation I will take in each and every moment of this gift from God. I will live for the moment and thank God for the honor of raising my precious children.

In His Calm,

Mary

Thankful Thursday ~ from an 8 year old boy

Last week I sat in a doctor's office twice with my son. Early in the week we were in the Orthopedics office having his hand checked after a fall at church. This visit led to a bright orange cast & the possible end to basketball for the season.

The second visit was to the Pediatric Neurologist he sees for migraines. As I sat in the office I was overcome by how blessed I am with the health of my children. We sat in the waiting room with parents whose children have illnesses that prevent them from having a normal childhood. 

One boy in particular touched my heart. He was not much younger than my son in age but developmentally he was so much younger. This boy won't be able to play basketball or baseball with his friends. He won't be able to climb pine straw covered hills in his backyard or build forts in the woods.

There are a lot of things he may not be able to do but as I watched him I saw how happy music made him. As he listened to the music on his mother's phone I loved seeing the smile that crossed his face and the way he danced in the waiting room. It brought a smile to my heart to watch him find pleasure in the little things of life.

How often do we get caught up in the busyness of life and forget to thank God for the little things? How often do we focus on the negatives in our lives and fail to see the small gifts God has given us in our life?

There may be things about ourselves we don't like, things that we see has a disability or things we wish were different. Instead of focusing on the negatives why not focus on the positives. 

Ask yourself how God blessed you by making you unique and what you can do with that unique quality to bless others.


As Garrett & I passed the time I talked with him about what made him happy and what he was thankful for. 

Continuing this Joy Dare with an 8 year old boy #1041 - #1050:

• watching you tube videos
• reading Everest Book 1
• working on my wax museum project for school with mom & dad
• water bottle with cold water to drink after recess
• riding my bike
• cool shoes
• cross necklace
• giving mom hugs
• sour gummy worms
• and I am thankful for my children's health

Taking the Joy Dare of counting 1000 gifts with Ann at A Holy Experience 

In His Calm,

Mary