First Love

So, I imagine your probably thinking, "Ok, Mary has a blog on Marriage. What makes her think she is such an expert that she can tell people how to have a Godly Marriage."

I'll tell you a secret. I am no expert. After 12 years of marriage I still mess up. I still become selfish, focusing solely on myself. And I still say and do things I shouldn't. But, one thing Jeff and I did early on in our relationship and still do today is commit to put God first and foremost. 

Revelation 2: 4,5 - But I have this against you, that you have left your first love. Therefore remember from where you have fallen, and repent and do the deeds you did at first...

I have had two opportunities in the last month to hear someone speak from this passage. The first was Karen Ehman who spoke at She Speaks, the  Proverbs 31 Ministries speaker, writer, and women's ministry conference I attended. The second was my pastor. Karen did a wonderful job helping us think back and remember how we felt when we first felt Christ's love for us. My pastor briefly looked at it from the stand point of the relationship with our spouse.

When I reflect on these verses a wave of emotions overcomes me. I am nearly brought to tears when I think of the incredible warmth of love I feel in the arms of Christ. He loves me when I become frustrated and lose my temper. He loves me when my thoughts wander away from Him He loves me when I commit to spending time with Him and then I get busy and I forget Him. He loves me in-spite of all I am! Feeling that love makes me want to go out to the mountain top and yell it out for all the world to hear. God loves me and God loves you! He loves us in-spite of who we are!

Then, when I think about how I felt about Jeff when we first met, I get all giddy inside. I remember the butterflies I would feel in my stomach every time I saw him. I would do anything to please him. I made sure I always looked nice. I gave him my utmost attention. I looked for ways to make him feel special. Now, 12 years later we have 2 young children and all the craziness that comes with life. And I think, do I still try to look nice? Do I give him my utmost attention? Do I look for ways to make him feel special? Honestly? I don't much of the time. I let the busyness of life overwhelm me and by the time life settles down enough for us to connect I have nothing left.

About two weeks ago I decided I would look for ways to help Jeff feel special. Last Saturday I woke up early and made Jeff a hot breakfast. Some of you may be thinking so, I do that a lot. Not me, Jeff loves a hot breakfast. Most of the time I go without breakfast. On mornings when we get a hot breakfast, other than frozen waffles from a toaster, its because Jeff makes it. As he finished breakfast that morning he looked at me and wanted to know what the special occasion was. I told him there wasn't one. I just wanted to make him breakfast just because I love him.

What about you? Do you remember what it was like when you first met and fell in love with your spouse? Is there something you need to rekindle? What do you need to do that you haven't done in a while or have never done?

Do you know Christ's love for you? Are there things in your life you need to change in order to turn back to God? I am reminded of a song we sang in choir this past Christmas. Forgive me, but I can't remember the name or the writer but the words are, "I believe in a cross; I believe He came for one, He came for all. Heaven's Child became a man; He gave His life for me in-spite of all I am."

Wow! God loved me so much He gave His Son for me! He gave His Son for YOU! I hope you are able to find some quiet this week to ponder that truth.

In His Calm,

Mary